jie found a job. :) daniel's gone. :( shawn's alive. :) something's happening to everyone! what's happening to ah^ya?
oh pastor, please please PLEASE lose my stupid article so that it won't be on the livingstones blog. i hum chee. :D please accidentally delete that email. please burn your computer. please forget all about it. yeah. ok at least he doesnt read this (i think.) or else he will be chasing me with a parang if his lappie burns out of the blue. cause it will be MY fault. HAHA.
hmm. jingz's gonna be gone in 3 weeks or so. who am i going to sms when i find a good makan place? who am i going to sms whenever i see something silly? who is going to answer all my questions? who am i going to go out with? who is going to pig out with me? who am i going to laugh at? who is going to laugh at me? who will i go shopping with? who is going to buy the same things as me? who is going to practise cheapoism with me? who will i feel at ease with now? whose hand will i hold?:( i feel like i'm lamenting the loss of a lover. hmm. hahhahaha. AIYO JINGZ! :( wait till 18th september leh. :(
anyway, anyway, it's been rather strange. i received 2 emails from 2 different dsa colleagues on 2 consecutive days. ooh. i miss my students loooads. :( when o when can i go back? how o how can i go back? in my brief 5 months working there, i've learnt alot. it is so different compared to interacting with them on an adhoc basis compared to the past 2 years. i no longer see the slanty eyes, the short built, the absence of the nose bridge or the so-called down syndrome symptoms in them. instead, i see ben. i see weijian. i see laura. i see june. i see all of them as individuals. i no longer have the mentality that "OH. i am working with people with down syndrome." instead, i walk into class thinking that "OH. i am working with john grace and johnson today." i'm glad that a suitable job is allocated to johnson ---> reading the bible to those who are in transition as st. andrew's austism centre. it totally suits him! yes, i always feel so ashamed whenever overwhelming faith bubbles out of him. if he can do it, why can't i? he loooves God so much, worship and idolising has been brought to a higher level of understanding. it broke my heart when weijian said to me a few months back," eh yafen. i am down syndrome. that's why i come to this aep workshop. you know? i am down syndrome. i am down syndrome. but i don't wanna come anymore." ah^ya became highly defensive of weijian. no weijian, you are not down syndrome, you are a PERSON with down syndrome. that's right, you are a person, just like me, just like karen, just like siti, just like people on the streets. you have 2 eyes, so do i! you have a nose, so do i! you like to be happy, and i am just the same as you! you just have one more chromosome than me. you can still travel independently. you can do so many things! if only society didn't judge you from what you CANNOT do to what you CAN do. ask them not to magnify your disability. make it a handicap, not a disability. go on, adovocate for your rights! you can do it! june, gabby, show people what you are SO capable of. you 2 are so talented, excel in your work place! i'm saddened that laura doesn't go to aep anymore. :( laura learnt how to write this year, and she loves it. ok she didn't learn how to write, she learnt how to hold a pen and made marks on a paper. but this is a huge improvement! oooooh. ben yao. :) haha. i love the way sunshine radiates from his face when he smiles. :) you've come a long way, my dear gombak beng. continue to prove to the world what you are capable of! i miss the kisses (even from john grace. ha!), i miss the million hugs, i even miss the pinching and the slapping. :) you guys always brighten up my day. why o why is the staff turnover rate so high. all the colleagues who were with me in jan are gone, gone, GONE. some of them are non verbal because they didnt learn how to speak when they were young. no early childhood intervention in the past. don't worry, i'll go and study hard and be a good speech therapist. :) i'll work from my heart. no. what i am most afraid of is being burnt out. and losing the passion. i love you guys. :) when karen sent me the email with the photos of them, she said that the clients and her miss me loads. waaaah. i nearly melted into a puddle cause i didn't realise how much i miss them. :( oh man oh man. :( i was grinning like a looney when i saw the photos. hahaha. so many people wanna help you guys. you guys have touched many lives, including mine. though i was your trainer, you all taught me many valuable lessons that others can't. i saw jonathan szeto, jessica's sister, at the world down syndrome congress in march. he was like "eh you are still here!" yuuuuup. he's taking something related to this field. i love you guys! really. :)
when ah^ya types like this, with no colour, read it at your own risk. cause it is just haphazard and incoherent thoughts jammed in her head. and normally, it isn't meant for people to read unless they really wanna read.
and pardon me for the english, for it is close to 1am.
me.
ah^ya
child of God
25th september 1987
18-going-19
hougang kindergarten
st. hilda's primary school
tanjong katong girls' school
victoria junior college
soon-to-be university college london :)
